louse [lous]
Noun
informal
derogatory, contemptible or unpleasant person.
synonyms:
scoundrel · villain · rogue · rascal · brute · animal · weasel · snake · monster · ogre · wretch · devil · good-for-nothing · reprobate · wrongdoer · evildoer · picaro · blackguard · miscreant · varlet · vagabond · rapscallion · whoreson
pl. lous·es (lous′ĭz) Slang A mean despicable person or disagreeable person, unpleasant person – a person who is not pleasant or agreeable
Traits of a toxic person – Bing video
My passion in life is communication in all its many forms. I enjoy nothing more than deep chats about life, love and the Universe. With a master’s degree in Journalism, I’m a former BBC news reporter and newsreader. But around 8 years ago I swapped the studio for a life on the open road. Lisbon, Portugal is currently where I call home.
My personal development articles have featured in Huffington Post, Elite Daily,
Thought Catalog, Thrive Global and more.
Written by Louise Jackson
1) Playing the victim
A loser may feel like life is against them. They can’t seem to catch a break.
Bad things happen to them, and they are always at the mercy of life.
Of course, some people really have been dealt a far worse hand than others.
Yet, there are plenty of people who still manage to create success and happiness
out of the worst conditions.
Winners take full responsibility for themselves, rather than always seeing everything as somebody else’s fault. Losers are unable to see that a victim mentality is the very attitude that keeps them stuck.
If we give other people power over our lives or feel dependent on how they behave to make us happy — it’s never going to end well.
Getting lost in self-pity, martyrdom, and telling yourself “Woe is me”
delays you from getting around to the important work of improving your life.
And at the end of the day, nobody else is going to do it for you.
2) Giving up all the time
No matter how much positive thinking you practice, let’s face it, life is hard sometimes. But when faced with challenges we only ever really have two choices.
We can either accept, deal with and move on from what has floored us or we quit and become defeated by it.
Of course, we’ve all felt pretty defeated by life at some point but winners eventually pick themselves up and start looking for solutions.
For example, if you feel like you don’t have any real friends — that certainly doesn’t make you a loser (it’s actually really common). But resigning yourself to a fate of loneliness when you want to make better connections does.
Losers convince themselves that nothing will ever change, so they give up on what matters most to them before they’ve even tried.
As the powerful Japanese proverb goes, “Fall down seven times, stand up eight.”
Successful people understand that failing and falling are only a part of their journey.
They have cultivated enough resilience so that they refuse to give up hope — which strengthens them to keep on striving.
One of the biggest reasons that people become losers, is that they give up and lose their personal power.
Begin with yourself.
Stop searching for external fixes to sort out your life, deep down,
you know this isn’t working!
And that’s because until you look within and unleash your personal power,
you’ll never find the satisfaction and fulfillment you’re searching for.
I learned this from the shaman Rudá Iandê. His life mission is to help people restore balance to their lives and unlock their creativity and potential. He has an incredible approach that combines ancient shamanic techniques with a modern-day twist.
In his excellent free video, Rudá explains effective methods to achieve what you
want in life and to stop being a loser.
So, if you want to build a better relationship with yourself, unlock your endless potential, and put passion at the heart of everything you do, start now by checking out his genuine advice. Here’s a link to the free video again.
3) Constant negativity
Last year, I tried to go a whole week without complaining and it was tough.
I think we don’t even spot how much negativity falls out of our mouths on a daily basis.
Whilst having a bit of a moan can feel habitual at times, constant complaining is not only bad for your health but even rewires your brain.
For some people, negativity is so deeply ingrained that it puts a dark cloud
over everything they do.
You know, those people who never have a good word to say.
I call them “negaholics” because negativity and complaining are almost an addiction.
Losers manage to completely miss the bright side and promptly arrive at why everything and everyone sucks. It’s an exhaustingly heavy energy to be around and that excessive complaining just makes life worse.
4) Being totally self-absorbed
An inability to give a damn about anybody but yourself leads to a very shallow existence.
Even if you’ve climbed “to the top” by stepping on countless others along the way,
it doesn’t matter what material gains you make, you’re still a loser where it counts.
Sometimes egocentric qualities can even seem to be traits that drive success in some people, but I guess it depends on your definition of “success”.
A feeling of contributing and caring for others has been shown to be important for our happiness.
Tom Rath in his book ‘It’s Not About You: A Brief Guide to a Meaningful Life’ put it this way: “Your life has an unknown expiration date. Your efforts and contributions to others do not. The time, energy and resources you invest in people you care for and your community keep growing forever.”
5) Arrogance
We’re always told how a healthy self-esteem is so important, so when does that cross over into arrogance?
Being unpleasantly proud or feeling like you’re better than everybody else might look like a mask of confidence from the outside, but I suspect it’s actually anything but.
Whenever I’ve looked down on people, it has served a purpose of helping to inflate my own ego and make them wrong and me right — so ultimately boiled down to a sign of my own insecurity.
Real winners in life don’t need to be cocky or full of themselves because they don’t have anything to prove.
Their sense of self or success comes from within and doesn’t feel threatened by others, which allows them to be humble.
6) Zero self-awareness
I mentioned in the intro that most people who have ever questioned if they are a bit of a loser, probably aren’t. That’s because even just the self-awareness to look for negative qualities or circumstances in our own life suggests a level of sensitivity.
The chances are that it doesn’t even dawn on real losers that there is anything wrong with them. They have an inability to analyze themselves with any degree of objectivity or perspective.
If you are able to contemplate yourself and how your actions, thoughts, or emotions do or don’t align with your internal standards — this really is 90% of the battle when it comes to change. We can’t ever make positive changes until we can see a problem.
Having zero self-awareness is an invisible prison that keeps you stuck where you are.
7) Narrow mindedness and an unwillingness to listen to others
I’m right, you are wrong, and I don’t want to hear it. Losers seem to know it all and will fight to “defend” their perspective. Differences of opinions are natural; the world is full of points of view.
The “truth” is actually a lot harder to define in many situations than we might expect.
But losers are unprepared to even consider someone else’s side of things, preferring to vilify or blame them.
The older I’ve got the more I’ve realized how very little I actually know, but I see this as progress. I used to have such a long list of “rights and wrongs” that only gave me tunnel vision.
I’m sure that striving to try and understand other people and learn from their experiences will be a lifelong journey for me — but one worth taking.
A lack of tolerance for others or an inability to listen can be destructive to not just our own lives, but everyone around us as well as the societies we belong to.
8) Extreme vanity
There’s loving yourself, and then there’s LOVING yourself.
I’m not talking about wanting to look nice on a night out or letting loved ones
know your fantastic exam results — which falls under healthy self-esteem.
But the irony is that excessive pride or admiration for how you look or what you
achieve is actually quite ugly and may even spill over into narcissism.
According to Psychological and Brain Sciences professor Susan Krauss Whitbourne,
it’s also most likely a sign of some deep-rooted insecurity:
“People who are constantly bragging about their great lifestyle, their elite education, or their fantastic children may very well be doing so to convince themselves that they really do have worth.”
The more you feel the need to big yourself up, the chances are the more of a loser you feel deep down. When we feel good about ourselves, we don’t usually feel the need to prove anything to anyone else.
9) Bitching about people behind their back
I read that gossiping serves some kind of social function.
Research has suggested it can stave off loneliness, facilitate bonding and act as a form of entertainment. I wonder if there’s anyone who could proudly raise their hand and say that they have never participated in gossip. I certainly couldn’t.
But any purpose it has, there’s also clearly a much darker side to it.
Unkindness, meanness, or even cruelty towards other people,
whether that is to their face or behind their back is pretty much just bullying.
Nobody is perfect and I’m sure most of us have hurt someone we care about with our words, but only losers actually feel good about tearing other people down.
But I get it, letting those feelings out can be hard, especially if you’ve spent so long trying to stay in control of them.
If that’s the case, I highly recommend watching this free breathwork video, created by the shaman, Rudá Iandê.
Rudá isn’t another self-professed life coach. Through shamanism and his own life journey, he’s created a modern-day twist to ancient healing techniques.
The exercises in his invigorating video combine years of breathwork experience and ancient shamanic beliefs, designed to help you relax and check in with your body and soul.
After many years of suppressing my emotions, Rudá’s dynamic breathwork flow quite literally revived that connection.
And that’s what you need:
A spark to reconnect you with your feelings so that you can begin focusing
on the most important relationship of all – the one you have with yourself.
So if you’re ready to take back control over your mind, body, and soul, if you’re ready to say goodbye to anxiety and stress, check out his genuine advice below.
Here’s a link to the free video again.
10) Absence of integrity
A loser’s moral compass is flexible depending on what suits them best at the time.
They may be easily prepared to forsake their values or the people and things they
believe in.
If you’re prepared to lie, cheat and sacrifice whatever you once held dear in order
to “succeed”, then no matter what you gain, in many people’s eyes, you’ll still be the
biggest loser they know.
11) Disrespecting yourself and others.
Disrespect might be being rude, angry, or generally emotionally unaware when
you’re speaking to others — but it equally applies to how you treat yourself too.
If you don’t believe in or respect yourself, you’re going to find you always seem
to end up on the losing side of life.
Without setting healthy boundaries, it’s easier for other people to manipulate
or take advantage of you.
Without a strong sense of self-worth, it’s difficult to find the courage to go after
what you want in life and believe it is possible for you or that you deserve it.
Sometimes we can be our own worst enemy and our own behavior is the most disrespectful that we tolerate — whether it is through destructive habits or
unkind self-talk.
12) A total lack of any purpose
Before writing this article, I was doing some research to see what qualities people
thought were signs of being a loser.
I noticed that quite a few viewed a lack of ambition or absence of goals as loser behavior. But I’m not so convinced.
Don’t get me wrong, I think it’s a beautiful thing when someone feels passionate, inspired, and motivated to achieve anything. I love the dreamers and doers who have big ideas and plans. If you have them, then great, go after them.
But I think that many of us also feel pressured to accomplish things in life, in order to feel good enough. Like we always should be working towards something momentous.
What if you don’t have any specific ambitions?
Does that make you a loser?
I really don’t think it does. I think the real problem arises when we can’t find
meaning from anything in our life. That is often when we feel lost, stuck or apathetic.
Experts tend to agree that seeking meaningfulness in life is even more important than happiness.
But I wonder if the trick is actually to discover meaning in everything we do and find purpose in the smallest of things. That way we see everyday life as the miracle that it actually is.
In a way, maybe finding purpose is an exercise in mindfulness rather than in acquisition. In the words of spiritual teacher Eckhart Tolle:
“Doing is never enough if you neglect Being. The ego knows nothing of being but believes you will eventually be saved by doing. If you are in the grip of the ego, you believe that by doing more and more you will eventually accumulate enough ‘doings’ to make yourself
feel complete at some point in the future. You won’t. You will only lose yourself in doing.
The entire civilization is losing itself in doing that is not rooted in Being and thus
becomes futile.”
13) Being entitled and spoiled
Spoiled people are losers because they will never be satisfied.
Feeling a sense of expectation from others around you or society, in general, is a quick route to disappointment.
If you are unable to feel grateful for what you have, it doesn’t matter how much you get out of life, you’ll always feel frustrated and lacking. The incredible thing about gratitude is that it actually makes you happier.
Is it ok to be a loser?
I don’t know about you, but I’m certainly no saint, and I know I’ve been guilty of
(And am still working on) some of these loser traits on the list.
Hey, we’re all only human and life is one giant classroom.
Maybe it’s ok to be a bit of a loser from time to time — it’s actually how we learn and grow.
It’s only not ok to be a loser if you know that you are guilty of some pretty shitty behaviour but make no attempts to do anything about it.
None of us are born winners or losers. It’s how we choose to respond to what happens in life and make the decision to change. I guess the good news then is that we actually have full control over whether we end up being a loser or not.
What makes a person a loser?
Losers are created when they become overly negative and have nothing positive in their life. This mindset is created through a lack of gratitude and appreciation for what they do have. Selfishness becomes the dominant way of living and everyone else is the problem in their eyes.
Why do I see myself as a loser?
There are a million reasons one might convince themselves of being a loser.
Lack of financial knowledge, or lack of money period. Feeling pressured to adhere to
societal timelines. A perceived failure or lack of success.
How do you know you’re a loser?
8 Habits That Can Make a Person Become a Loser
Being jealous and vilifying others.
Loving free or cheap stuff.
Rejecting other people’s opinions.
Procrastinating.
Not knowing how to communicate with other people.
Giving up on our goals and principles.
Not believing in ourselves.
Comparing ourselves to others.
How do you stop thinking I’M A Loser?
You can make a choice to stop thinking about being a loser or endlessly thinking
about yourself. It’s in your power. Give yourself something to focus on besides yourself.
Don’t compare yourself to others.
Stop trying to live up to everyone else’s standards.
Stop complaining, stop talking about your problems or shortcom.
How do I stop being pathetic?
The best way to stop being pathetic or worrying entirely about you is to focus your
energy in helping someone else. It will give you something else to focus on and give you something else to talk about with others. Try doing some volunteer work.
What is a loser mentality?
The loser mentality is that things need to be done every single way that you
want them done, because if they’re not done that way, well, then you lose control.
What does it mean if a girl calls you a loser?
When women say you’re a loser, they don’t mean for it to be entertainment or funny.
They mean that what you’re doing is so unattractive that you don’t stand a chance with them. That what you’re doing is repulsive.
It has nothing to do with your looks, race, looks, etc.
What’s worse than being a loser?
The only thing worse than being a loser is being a spectator. Sure, the spoils
only go to the victor. But the spectator never even gave themselves a chance.
Is Loser an insult?
You may have heard losers used to insult someone who has not had a lot of success in life, someone who might not have many friends.
What is the meaning of ne’er do well?
: an idle worthless person.
What is the definition of nobody?
: no person: not anybody. nobody. noun. plural nobodies.
What is the meaning of I am nobody?
1 pron Nobody means not a single person, or not a single member of a particular group or set. 2 n-count If someone says that a person is a nobody, they are saying in an unkind way that the person is not at all important.
What is the opposite of nobody?
Antonyms: anyone, anybody, everybody, somebody, someone, everyone.
What is another word for nobody?
LIGHTWEIGHT
NONENTITY
nullity
number
pigmy
pip-squeak
pygmy
shrimp
snippersnapper
twerp
What is the positive word of nobody?
In this page you can discover 41 synonyms, antonyms, idiomatic expressions, and related words for nobody, like: no one, absence, somebody, not a soul, vip, sycophant, jackstraw, not anybody, zero, nullity and upstart.
What is an unimportant person called?
If you’ve ever felt like a bit of a loser, firstly,
I think that a lot of us have likely felt that way at some point or another.
Secondly, the simple fact that you’ve even pondered it, highlights one of the
reasons you are probably not a loser.
Why? Because I’m not sure real losers actually ever see themselves as such.
So, what makes a loser a loser?
Some people may argue it’s the car you drive, the job you have, or whether you still live
at home with your parents at the age of 45. But these are just surface markers that don’t define us.
Surely what makes someone a loser (or a success) in life goes so much deeper to our core.
In this article, I’ll run through 13 traits that I think will turn anyone into a real loser in life.
How do I know if I am a loser?
The times in my life when I’ve felt like a loser have happened when I tried to measure myself with the wrong scale.
What I mean by that is, I’ve taken an outside look at other people’s lives and concluded that in comparison I don’t stack up somehow.
They’ve achieved something I haven’t, they earn money that I don’t, they have a relationship status I wished I had.
I don’t know if you can relate, but you end up throwing so many “shoulds” at yourself —
I “should” have this, I “should” be here by now — that you never stand a chance under
the weight of all the unfair expectations.
A loser is a person who is ultimately a bit worthless. But what defines someone’s worth?
I think you can have millions in the bank, be at the top of your field and still be a bit of a loser.
Ultimately in life, it’s not our ever-changing external life circumstances that really define us, surely, it’s our character.
So, if you’re wondering if you’re destined to be a loser, it’s more about the qualities you embody and who you chose to be.
What’s your superpower?
Our revealing new quiz will help you discover your hidden superpower
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Source Louise Jackson, Author at Ideapod