WE ALL Thought War Was HELL

Posted on May 28, 2018 by Ken
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Three generations (father, son and his son) U.S. Army Air Corp/ U.S.A.F.

IT is  coincidental for me my father would have been 97 years old today (May 28 1921.)        I always wonder what if he would have got killed running …. onto Ohama Beach during WWII.  During W.W.II they didn’t send you new equipment you repaired what you had. Being one of the Seven devils who would run through hell to fix a jeep or tank  in the  Heart of Socialist Nazi Country in Nuremburg Germany. As well he could have lost his   life in train cars trying to get a little sleep with bombs going off all around him.

I ask myself over and over. . . many times while he was a live . . .  who would I be . . .        if he had been a casualty of war.     IN Remembrance those who served!!!

 My father had a strong constitution from being a WWII Veteran to also driving a truck     without power steering through the back roads of Pennsylvania during the 1950’s when this country was striving to make it out of the depression. He always stated this country didn’t have much until Unions where formed and Americans got fed up with having little      so they fought their way out and was coined. . . The Greatest Generation for that effort.   Until his death his thoughts was this generation would manage themselves back into a depression . . . if we didn’t have that will to fight back (Political correctness wasn’t in his calling.)

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In his Lifetime my father loved traveling the Interstate System!!!

Interstate Highway System In December 1918, E. J. Mehren, a civil engineer and the editor of Engineering News-Record, presented his   “A Suggested National Highway Policy                & Plan” during a gathering of the State Highway Officials & a Highway Industries Association at the Congress Hotel in Chicago.  In the plan, E.J. Mehren proposed a 50,000-mile (80,000 km) system, consisting of five east–west routes and 10 north–          south routes. The system would  include  two percent of all roads and would pass        through every state at a cost of $25,000 per mile  providing commercial as well as      military transport benefits.
The Dwight D. Eisenhower National System of Interstate and Defense Highways, commonly known as the Interstate Highway System, is a network of controlled-access highways that forms part of the National Highway System in the United States. The      system is named for President Dwight D. Eisenhower, who championed its formation. Construction was authorized by the Federal Aid Highway Act of 1956, and the original portion was completed 35 years later, although some urban routes were cancelled and never built. The network has since been extended and, as of 2016, it had a total length      of 48,191 miles. As of 2016, about one-quarter of all vehicle miles driven in the country       use the Interstate system. In 2006, the cost of construction was estimated at about $425 billion.   https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Interstate_Highway_System
 This Memorial Day Weekend I think back to 12 years ago when I lost my father to Leiomyosarcoma. Leiomyosarcoma is one of the more common types of soft tissue sarcoma to develop in adults. It is rare though with 4 in 1 million cancer patients getting this type of cancer.  (LMS) is a type of soft tissue sarcoma.  Soft tissue sarcomas can develop in muscle,  fat,  blood vessels,  or any of the other tissues that support, surround and protect the organs of the body. With chemotherapy rarely being effective against their spread. Looking back what would had been a better option.
For my father cancer began when he was 70 years old with bladder cancer and with each time he was treated. They the medical profession thought they got it all. First go around was radium treatments. Then radiation and the last go around was chemotherapy which made survival for him taxing with harsh side effects.  With each time the secondary cancer would be more aggressive than the last. Many days he would get up telling us toward the end stage that he would get up sick and tired of being sick and tired. Leiomyosarcoma was 10 times worse than WWII because during the war you had a better chance of survival.
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  That constitution served him well during his 14 year battle with cancer. By talking to him. . . he never allowed having cancer stop him from doing what he wanted do. I had a greater helpless feeling than he had. In those 14 months that he was labeled terminal (Ohio State Labeled it a year) February 24 2005. . . until his death on April 3 2006. He still constantly played the game of solitaire which seen him through an abusive father, the depression and WWII, However, in those 14 months he won hands of solitaire 14 times simply by walking through the hand with the 4 aces at the top of the board. This he said put him at peace at where he was heading must be much easier than life!!!
For me watching someone terminal created a helpless feeling that drove me   into severe depression. Motivated me to do my own cancer research after his death and to start this blog that guides people through a dysfunctional health care system that should be considered a cancer maze. Without little concrete answers. 
 
The lyrics are just ambiguous enough to lend the listener many different meanings.  The take we get on a song is so very much based on our perception of life and our vantage points in our life at any given time.  This song is a perfect example of that.   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f6pQcpFnXOI
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However, looking back I wish I knew what I know today because that type of understanding and being made aware of the facts may have serve him well. 
Do I have regrets …  Sure DO!!
 
Divine Intervention:
 
The vision for this blog post started after I prayed the rosary and attended mass at The Basilica and National Shrine of. Our Lady of Consolation in Carey Ohio. This was mid March 2006 and on the drive home. I visualized a website on the internet with answers to cancer and cancer survivor stories. It was the following weekend when I met a Chinaman in Kettering that had been researching cancer for seven years. In this chance meetings        I had with Mant Prowg told me it was culture shock when he came here and seen what people ate and taught me the basic difference between Eastern and Western Medicine and taught me that in China the youth are educated better nutritionally than in the United States.
 
In the coming years it was always the next person that taught me something needed to finally helped me gain the skill to write blog post. I truly believe that GOD puts people in our walk that helps us to fulfill our walk on life that completes our mission in the end. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qyAdlngs6Nk
 
Life will break you.  Nobody can protect you from that, and living alone won’t either, for solitude will also break you with its yearning. You have to love. You have to feel.   It is the reason you are here on earth. You are here to risk your heart. You are here to be swallowed up.  When it happens that you are broken, or betrayed, or left, or hurt, or death brushes near, let yourself sit by an apple tree and listen to the apples falling all around you in heaps, wasting their sweetness. Tell yourself you tasted as many as you could. ~Louise Erdrich
Take time to be thankful for everyone in your life; whether they are in your life for a Reason, a Season, or a Lifetime. Know that most relationships are two ways. Don’t presume you are in someone’s life to serve them for a reason or season without considering what it is you need to learn from them. We are all here for each other.
 
  His cancer  was first mentioned to me shortly after his retirement began. Which my Father truly felt a sense of lost being a machinist of trade through World War II. where       he turned a part in the shop and went on a mission to repair a jeep or tank.  After 32 yrs. of employment and being a machinist: he then was afforded an opportunity to go back to Germany to visit his youngest (my brother) stationed near Kaiserslautern (Ramstein Airbase) Kaiserslautern → Nuremberg  which was 200 miles.
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On that trip. .  . . he went thru Munich to Hitler’s “Eagle’s Nest” Retreat – Berchtesgaden, Germany and didn’t recognize one thing.  YES  it all had changed and through that transformation of being war torn when he left             to modern day times. He wondered how many American Soldiers that he    buried had their remains not there.
Maybe it was some of those lost emotions he had to relive on that trip is         what gave him cancer. Or maybe it was the coolant he used to turn parts            or the diesel fuel to drive the truck when he arrived home after the war.            He was always a Corn Flake, beef eater and microwave popcorn & coke      drinker kinda guy as well!!!
 
By doing my own research and not putting blind faith in the health care system I would have known his best          options. I have learned since that his diet made my father an innocent bystander for cancer. GMO’s, hormones and a extremely high acidic diet :'( 
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and also

Dakota Neal successfully survived an otherwise incurable cancer with an optimistic determination and a team of compassionate, unrelenting specialists. To read about Dakota’s battle with leiomyosarcoma, check out Miracle Survivors: Beating the Odds of Incurable Cancer. https://cancercentersocal.com/uncategorized/overcoming-stage-iv-leiomyosarcoma-survival-story-one-dr-chawlas-patients/
From an anonymous source:
 
When a loved one enters the dying process, it would be so helpful to know what to expect, what to look for.  After being at the bedside of hundreds of deaths, I decided to write a hand book for families to help them navigate these waters.  Gone From My Sight is the first and most widely used handbook on the signs of approaching death.  Churches, families, social workers, nurses, chaplains need this book.  Do you have yours? 
 
 Beautiful tear…
 
I have seen this tear often on my med floor for those patients I was at their bedside when they died. I also saw it 2 years ago when my own mother passed away gently at home. I would gently wipe the tear away, but I never thought of anything about it except as a physical proponent of death. The tears I saw never left the eye to run down the face. The tear was in the inner or outer canthus, depending on gravity. The ones who had the tear had a quiet death usually on a morphine gtt and an ativan gtt if it was in-hospital. My mother was ready to die for 10 years and vocally would express this wish. I was surprised by your question as I had never thought of it as anything else. To answer your question, I would say it is a relief to them that death is happened and they can now join their parents, siblings and other family members.
 
It is usually the matriarch or patriarch of the family who is passing so tears on their part is unusual as this is a defining moment for them in front of people who they’ve raised and influenced their whole lives. They are experienced in life and have told me they want to be remembered as accepting and content to pass. There’s that “I don’t want to stress any of them, so I’ll leave when they do” phenomenon, which is witnessed quite often.
 

I understand it could be physiological, but I personally believe there’s an emotional reason behind it. I have 2 theories.

First, people who have had near death experiences always talk about how beautiful and peaceful it is. It would be very interesting to know if these people had this tear during their experience. My second theory is this: Many of my patients (when they were alert and could speak) knew they would be passing soon.

People usually become very lethargic or unresponsive when they are close to passing       and are no longer able to speak. I believe they are still aware though, and that tear may     be caused by them being sad because they know it’s time to leave. Yes, I am sorry they    feel sadness, but on the other hand, it is the intense love they have for you that makes them sad to leave. This is something I explain to my family members who are afraid to    say good-bye to their loved one because they feel they will cry too much and make the patient feel bad. You cry so hard for them because you love them so much.

It’s an absolute blessing to have someone you love so much you don’t want to leave      them. Tears are proof of that intense love.

Like I said earlier, that it could possibly be physiological, but most of my patients are dehydrated and their eyes are very dry. Some people even keep their eyes open, so they  are excessively dry. I’ve seen single tears in these people as well. Something I’m sure of though, is that the single tears I’ve seen were definitely not due to discomfort or physical pain.

You also spoke about hearing being the last sense to go and for how long. I am a firm believer in people being able to hear until the end. The reason why I believe this so strongly is I’ve had several people who were completely unresponsive and waited until their family left before they passed. Family would be at the bedside 24/7, and they step into the bathroom for 5 minutes, and the person passes. I’ve also had people hold on when it looked absolutely impossible, and less than 5 minutes after the family arrives the person passes. We have all seen it too many times to be coincidental. If I’m alone with someone when they pass, I always assume they can hear me and wish them a peaceful journey.

  I have to say though, please forgive me in advance for being blunt and having a bit of an angry tone. Firstly, in my research, it is VERY COMMON when someone is moments from death who has been ill for a long time to have tears seconds before they pass. This is a natural response by the body. There is no emotional or cognitive association to this. It IS a physiological response.

I can only come to the following conclusions in regard to these comments where posters are writing that they never seen this before. My assumptions are that those who allegedly work in the field either haven’t been in the industry very long, are on auto-pilot at work, are oblivious or lack any observation skills when dealing with the dying. If it’s the latter,      I really have to ask, “what are you really doing here”?  Is this simply a job  for you or are working here to help others? Are you blindly going on about your job without any care  and attention and tuning everything out?   That’s not the kind of person I want to be assisting a loved one.

Secondly, to write “who really knows”? Well, is this comforting to the loved ones still alive? Science says tearing is a normal part of the dying process and the living should not read anything more into this. Regardless of your faith, if you have a faith, this kind of comment is not helpful whatsoever. The family is already in mourning and if they think in any way their loved one did not die in peace or has regrets, this may be one of the most traumatic events one can endure in their lives.

Thirdly, if someone dies in a hospice or who is receiving palliative care, the person has likely “left on their journey” soon after the heavy, heavy increase in narcotics to help the patient die more peacefully. The deep and struggling breaths is the body shutting down. The body becomes slowly colder and the the breathing between breaths become longer  and longer until the both the heart and breathing stops.

Finally, based on some of the responses here, I am further disturbed by the lack of  training given to palliative/hospice care employees in regards to the death process           and what the loved ones may see. When we are told “hearing is the last to go”.

The real question I have is, “when is that”? Before the last breath? After a period                 of heavy sedation?

I truly hope my post helps others not feel guilty or sad about their loved one should        they see them teary eyed moments before death.

 
You also spoke about hearing being the last sense to go and for how long. I am a firm believer in people being able to hear until the end. The reason why I believe this so strongly is I’ve had several people who were completely unresponsive and waited until their family left before they passed. Family would be at the bedside 24/7, and they step into the bathroom for 5 minutes, and the person passes. I’ve also had people hold on when it looked absolutely impossible, and less than 5 minutes after the family arrives the person passes. We have all seen it too many times to be coincidental. If I’m alone with someone when they pass, I always assume they can hear me and wish them a peaceful journey.
 
He had a few tears in the last moments. It bothered me to wonder if he was sad. To my relief, I found the following information at Webmd.com. Hope it helps all of us who are grieving (What to Expect When Your Loved One Is Dying) :
Signs That Death Is Near continued…When death is within days or hours, your loved one may:
  • Not want food or drink
  • Stop peeing and having bowel movements
  • Grimace, groan, or scowl from pain

You may notice their:

  • Eyes tear or glaze over
  • Pulse and heartbeat are irregular or hard to feel or hear
  • Body temperature drops
  • Skin on their knees, feet, and hands turns a mottled bluish-purple (often in the last 24 hours)
  • Breathing is interrupted by gasping and slows until it stops entirely
  •  Enjoy reading: https://www.instantflipbook.com/flipbooks/8e46b7a8d2/?page=1
  If they’re not already unconscious, your loved one may drift in and out. But they probably can still hear and feel.   At the End

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jDChYZHfTiM

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